Tired

It's a curious thing when your body and mind reach a level of exhaustion that no amount of rest can seem to alleviate.

I'm not sick. I'm not sleepy. I'm not depressed (or at least not more than usual). For the last few days I've been in a constant groggy haze. No desire, especially not to do any of the things that are expected of me. It's been a struggle to make it through the day without completely shutting down.

I'm used to feeling this way because of depression. This is something else. It's a lack of caring about much of anything. Even things that would usually trigger anger or sadness haven't elicited much response at all. In some ways I'd prefer being the ticking time bomb I normally am to this. This giant ball of nothingness.

As always though my only defense mechanism is to retreat. Escape. Hide. Only in this case I don't even know what I'm hiding from.